BODY BUILDING JOKES

Did you hear about the weightlifting vegetable? He was a muscle sprout.

What does a bodybuilder do for cardio? He lifts weights faster.

What do you call terrorist that’s ripped? Osama Bin Liftin.

I don’t always take a rest day but when I do, It’s to give the weights a day off.


Why did the blonde get a perm? Because her trainer said curls might help.



What does leg day and sex have in common? When done right you can’t walk for days.

What is a bodybuilders favorite show on Netflix? Stronger Things.

Why couldn’t the bodybuilder get evicted? Because he was squatting.

What happened when the bodybuilder brought a lion to the gym? He got ripped to shreds.

I asked a bodybuilder “Do you need to eat eggs to get jacked?” He said “No Whey!”

Why do hamburgers go to the gym? To get better buns.

What does a bodybuilder think before he deadlifts? Don’t Fart….Don’t Fart…..

Why did the fish stop lifting weights? He pulled a mussel.


Why did the bodybuilder grab a new shirt? Someone told him he was ripped.

How do you get revenge on your ex-boyfriend? Do some squats and make him wish he still had dat ass.

Why do oysters go to the gym? It’s good for the mussel.

Don’t Cha wish your girlfriend could squat like me!


I got 99 problems because that’s how many muscles are sore.

My average leg day is doing diddly squat. Someone call CSI, I just killed my workout. I asked a bodybuilder what he does for cardio and he said “I lift weights faster”

That moment you realize the squats are paying off. I could bench press your boyfriend.

That day when you no longer have to photoshop your gains. If lifting was easy, it would be called “Your Mom”.

Mr. T doesn’t lift weights because it infers that he has limits to his strength.

“I’m gonna lose weight. I’m gonna lift and exercise everyday. I’m gonna go on a diet and stick to it.” ……. “Is that cake?”